Two of a Kind

I am glad we have two kids. I never realized how quiet it was, growing up as an only child. Quiet is never (ever) available here. But the two amigos are truly amigos and ninjas and funny. I would have another kid if I thought I could take the noise. I can't. No way.
The kids are really starting to get funny. James, especially. He is learning the fun in taunting his sister. Telling her things like, "There's a gorilla outside!" And she goes, "Oh no, Bubbba!!!!" and starts crying. He says, "Oh yes there it is!" and he chases her to her room.

But, I tell you... I am blown away by the smart mouth of a four year old. God is giving me exactly what I deserve, I suppose.

Me:        Do not hit!  You be nice to your sister, James!
James:   YOU be nice to ME, mom.
Me:        What did you say?
James:   You heard it.
Me:        You go straight to timeout.
James:    YOU go to timeout.

Oh boy.  The kid's lucky he survived that day. 

My favorite: is the kids' uses of appropriately timed expletives. I try to not say "shit" in general (although it's my favorite bad word), but especially in front of the kids. But when I broke my foot a few weeks, I think I came wailing in the house with something like "shit shit shit shit" pouring out of my mouth.

Well, it wasn't one day, and Stella fell. First thing she said?  Do I need to repeat it?

Kids are a mess.  I am still tired. Four years later.  Right now, they are wrapped up like tacos in the hallway runner rug.  Literally destroying the house right before my eyes.  What can I do?

Nothing, so I just drink coffee and enjoy it.